Scrap paper wisdom: 3 steps and a really big question

Here's another bit of wisdom that's been up on my wall for a long time.  Sometimes I have something up for so long that I begin to not even see it any more.   I tend to rotate them and this is one that's been filed away for a while.  I'm glad I found it again!  Maybe it will speak to you.   It's a pretty great bit strategy that works during a fight with my spouse, conflict at work or just when I'm feeling crummy about myself.

Step 1:  What am I feeling?  What are my body reactions?  What am I telling myself about my ability to handle this situation?  What is TRUE of my ability?

Step 2:  What do I want from this situation or for myself?  What is actually under my control?  What is not under my total control?  Am I willing to to accept the situation and my degree of control as it is?

Step 3:  Focus on acting and feeling in a manner that is in your best interest.  What feeling or quality (calm etc) could I express right now that would help me achieve my goal?  What (self talk) would I be thinking if I were actually expressing that quality and getting what I want?  What would I be doing?

And the big hairy question at the end of it all:  Am I willing to do it?

Here's to being willing my friends...